“BREAKING NEWS! MCA Leaves Barisan Nasional.” If only this were not an April Fool’s joke…

This was viral on WhatsApp on April 1st, 2017.

Neo Tar Pean, presumably the writer, is probably not a real name. Tar Pean is Chinese for Big Toilet, that is, Poop or Faeces. Neo could be New.

BREAKING NEWS!

MCA Leaves Barisan Nasional

Neo Tar Pean / 31st March 2017

KUALA LUMPUR : In the biggest political development in Malaysia since
the exclusion of PAS from Pekatan, the Malaysian Chinese Association
(MCA), a component of the coalition Barisan Nasional (National Front)
announced its withdrawal from the Barisan.

Speaking to reporters after the quarterly MCA Central Committee
meeting, Presdient Dato’ Sri Liow Tiong Lai who is also the incumbent
Minister of Transport, said that he has resigned from his post with
immediate effect and the Central Committee has instructed all members
of the MCA who are holding any Government position to resign
forthwith. Any member who refuses is considered dismissed from the
Party.

“We have decided that after years of patiently doing our part as an
equal partner of the Alliance which fought for our independence from
the British colonial powers and later as unwavering partners in the
Barisan Nasional, we have seen the steady erosion of our status as
equal partner to a minion.”

Erosion of Power-Sharing

Recalling the first Malayan cabinet established after the historic
1955 General Election, he said the composition was supposed to be the
power-sharing formula within the Alliance with UMNO taking the
Premiership and the Home Ministry. The MCA was allocated the ,
Ministry of Transport, Ministry of Health, Ministry of Labour & Social
Welfare, Ministry of Communications, Telecommunications & Posts and
the all-important Ministries of Finance and Trade & Industry. In
addition, one of the Deputy Ministers of Education was always from the
MCA.

Alas, election after election since 1957, the MCA have been forced to
give up all the significant portfolios and are now left with one of 12
Ministers in the Prime Minister’s department, one of the two Ministers
of International Trade & Industry and the Ministry of Transport. The
MCA were also given deputy positions in other ministries: Finance (2
out of 5), Internatioal Trade & Industry (2/4), Education (1/3) &
Women, Family & Community Development (1/2).

To further underline the attrition of the influence of the MCA, Dato’
Sri Liow said that the MCA (originally formed to safeguard the
position of the Chinese community), with the only Ministry that it is
nominally in charge of, seemed totally helpless against directives
whereby all Chinese-held licences for the operation of bus routes, for
example, were systematically withheld and given over to connected UMNO
supporters. AP (approved permits) for the import of cars were almost
completely given to UMNO-connected companies. Ironically, we could not
even protect the business interest of the community that we are
supposed to safeguard in the only Ministry that we are supposed to be
top dog.

Ketuanan Melayu

Dato Sri continued that the original Alliance struggled for a secular
nation with some safeguards (supposedly for a transistent period of
time of say, 10 or 20 years) for the more backward part of the
community to catch up. However, after the ascension of the second and
third Prime Minister, the special concessions became more of a right
and we started hearing about “Ketuanan Melayu”…

Meritocracy was thrown out of the window with the inevitable fall in
standards. Can you imagine a nation with 18 public universities with
no non-Bumiputra good enough to be a Vice Chancellor and practically
not a single dean of a faculty? Standards have fallen and we are off
the world ranking. The sub-tertiary national education also suffered
with standard dropping year after year with only the
independently-financed Chinese-medium school being able to maintain
standards at par with the world. Funding for the Chinese school was
unfortunately grudgingly and sparingly given, making the position of
the MCA very untenable among the Chinese community.

Shariah Bill RUU355

In recent months, the UMNO support for the PAS Bill placed the MCA in
such an embarrassing position of not being able to voice our
opposition under the Barisan Protocol of no external dissension. In
public, we were flailed by all and sundry for not speaking out
vehemently against this divisive bill. Yes, the Prime Minister has,
after much internal pressure from us and other Barisan parties,
decided not to table the Bill BUT this is too little too late. Our
credibility among the non-Bumiputra community has been severely
compromised.

Future Paths

The whole MCA Central Committee deliberated long and hard and the time
has come when we must part company with our former colleagues, Dato’
Sri Liow said. We will be speaking with Pakatan about joining via a
merger with the DAP (Democratic Action Party) whereby the enlarged
entity may be called the Malaysian Action Party. Together we will,
through Pakatan provide a MAP for the future of Malaysia, he said with
a chuckle at the acronym.

The MCA has established over the years many valuable properties in
each of the towns but falling membership has meant empty premises
where even our TaiChi classes are under-subscribed. Maybe, with the
infusion of the enthusiastic DAP members, we will once again bring
glory and relevance to the party of HSLee and Tan Cheng Lock.

In an immediate response, Dato’ Sro Mohamed Nazri Abdul Aziz, Minister
of Tourism & Culture commented “No difference lah. They have been so
quiet for so long… we might not even miss them”

Mr S Thayaparan, former Commander (Rtd) of the Royal Malaysian Navy
and columnist for Malaysiakini remarked that this is amazing grace.
The MCA was blind but now it sees. The political background is once
again given a game changer and we are looking ahead to interesting
times.

Footnote : The shock annoucement by Dato’ Sri Liow was made at around
5.30 pm, well after the closure of the Kuala Lumpur Stock Exchange. It
is not known what the impact of this latest developement will have on
business sentiments.

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